Wednesday, 21 February 2007


It is upon us......There is no going back.....It is the

Savage Stag Invitational Golf Weekend

Four days of golf intermingled with some Indian food, Pokeyoke, and vast amounts of varied alcohol.....Ding Ding..Let's get it on.

So first of all, where are we playing? Well tomorrow, (Thursday) is going to be a warm up round for those in desperate need of the practice. It's at a small but chalenging little Muni known as Allerton in Liverpool. And here is me and fellow golfing Legend, Greg.

On Friday we are really treating ourselves with a visit to the wonderful Nefyn And District Golf Club in Wales.

Saturday sees the happy band head out to Pennant Park Golf Club in Holywell.

And finally Sunday ends the golfing stag do at Pryors Hayes Golf Club near Wrexham.

And this leaves only the players who will be partaking in this special tournament....And there are even trophies now.

In no particular order..........

Representing Bidston, and sponsored by Create UK, On the Tee,

Mr Greg Walker
Age - Unidentified
Job - Very Important Chap with a big swivelly chair.
Handicap - 24

Distinguishing feature - A unique two phase swing that when executed well can result in blistering drives, but when it goes wrong Greg usually hits the nearest pylon.

Representing Royal Tranmere

Mr Matty Lane (& Mr Matty Lane)
Age - Youthful yet knowledgable
Job - Technology expert and top spark
Handicap - 26

Distinguishing features - Matty Lane is capable of hitting a ball over 300 yards with his new sasquatch club. Unfortunately Matty's other half, Matty, has lost his memory, so we are concerned if he will remember to turn up.

Representing Stoneycroft

Mr Dave Campbell
Age - Open to offers
Job - Bad Man Catcher & part time snoozer
Handicap - 22

Distinguishing features - Dave is a keen lover of the woods. Be it off the tee, off the fairway from 200 yards plus, and indeed 15 to 20 yards from the green. He loves them. Dave has also transformed and revised the "chopping" golf action from the mid rough.

Representing Liscard

Mr Steve Palmart
Age - A mere snip of a lad
Job - Upsetting every other golfer with his swing
Handicap - 7 (There is already murmors of disapproval)

Distinguishing Features - Most definately the real deal golfer on our comp. This fella can hit a ball out of the course. And the rest of his game aint to shabby either. His down side is that he says he would do strange things to a Mr Steven Gerrard.....Very strange.

Representing Higher Tranmere

Mr Mark "Pigeon Boy" Allen
Age - 9
Job - he is still at school obviously!
Handicap - 22

Distinguishing Features - Where does one start? Has vastly improved his all round game over the past few months. Continuously hides new slinky golf outfits from his good lady...Joke Ali! Is tomorrow getting me up early so that we can go to get him a new driver at the Early Learning Centre. His downfulls are the massive amounts of red wine he will consume between games.

There are indeed a handful of further players who will be joining us, including:

From Tranmoire and sponsered by Cleanline, DR Robbie Davin [H26]

From North of the border all the way from Dundee, Mr Ellis Lawrence [H25]

From Chester and best man of the fella above, Mr (I'm not sure of his name) H?]

I am now going to bed on the eve of this exciting tournament, and will publish pics and scores after the weekend. I am expecting Pigeon Boy to be knocking on my door at any minute pissing himself with excitement.
I would like to thank everyone who is involved, and I wish you the best of luck.
Cheers Boys.

Wednesday, 14 February 2007


Well another thing to tick off the old wedding list of things to do before June.....The wine has been well and truly removed from a leading French supermarket.
After some time spent driving around the industrial wastelands of Calais.....not the most scenic of French towns believe me, we finally found Le Citie De Europe, a large out of town shopping centre housing none other than a Tesco filled entirely of booze....a step in the right direction one would have to say, along with various foreign shops stocking bizarre shoes and pungent cheeses.
Amidst this chaos was the French supermarket Carrefeur which had six or so magnificently stocked aisles of cheap French Wine. Within a period of forty minutes we had crammed two of the biggest shopping trolleys I had ever seen with as much wine as they could hold, along with a packet of macaroons and two pain au raisons, for sustenance of course.
Having been delighted with the final checkout price, we wheeled the groaning trolleys to the car and set about raising the front suspension, and prompting the need to put air in the back tyres.

A steady drive back to the port was next on the agenda with a few hairy moments as my Dad, who just for the record spent years and years and years driving Trucks around every European country, forgot which way he should drive round a French roundabout.....Slightly worrying.

As we drove into the port of Calais, we were stopped by a French fella in a little fluorescent jacket. He asked in his dodgy English, " it possible to ave a look in ze back of ze car please?"

And he did, and then asked, " Are you avin a party or somesing?" We replied that it was for our wedding in june, to which the French official said, " and you will send me an invite yes?"

As you can see, incredibly tight security at our ports in these times of international terrorists. So it was over to good old England and a leisurely trip back to the Isle of Sheppey in Kent for a smack up roast dinner at Mrs Savage's eatery, and lashings and lashings of beer. And a jolly time was had by all....Especially my Mums little dog Billy who can be seen below....enjoying a walk on the beach.....Ah bless him.

Wednesday, 7 February 2007


Well, it's quite possible, although I have to admit, much against my better judgement I think it probably has more to do with my unavoidable and ever increasing years. Something that without a doubt, comes to us all.

My Dad, (great philosopher of the South East) says, "It's either going to rain or get dark before the morning". And it is with this ever advancing realisation that I am beginning to accept my destiny.

I have for many years now wondered why I don't score as many goals at the footie on Friday night. In the same arena I have begun to accept the occasional visit to the Doctor's surgery after a particularly lengthy hill walk, whereas a few years back I would have taken a couple of paracetamol and gone back in a few days and repeated the trek.

I think this somewhat sombre blog entry was prompted by my buddy and best man, Mr White Rover of Stoneycroft, and his tale of the return to the early morning cycling routine.

I have a reasonably up to date free weights bench in my back bedroom that I have convinced myself on a twice monthly basis for the past eight months, that I will hammer it three times a week.............Hmmmmmmm. It also doubles up as a fantastic clothes horse.

Oh well, away with all this talk of dilapidated and aching muscles and joints......Lets have a few photos of me doing some wild activities and proving to myself primarily that I am still worthy of a little recreation......
Here you can see me falling into a river after hanging onto a particularly slippery gorge...oohherr

Ascending a rocky crag in the welsh hills...International man of action.....I'm convincing myself..

Jumping into the sea from a rocky peak on Anglsey......5.6 for the entry....4.2 for artistic merit...

And as the great man Weller says...this is me going underground in an old lead mine....cold.wet..

I suppose I could always take up golf....That's suppose to be a sport of the old and insane....Hang on a minute...I already play. Me and Wogan are becoming ever more the same person, except he only works for two hours a day and takes more holidays than I am actually at work.....Something to work towards for the future maybe?
Please keep a look out for the fourth coming Stag Golf weekend that is taking place in the near future..I'm sure that it will produce some Blog worthy stories.
Well, i think I have convinced myself that perhaps I still got it in some very small degree. And with those limping skeletons banished to the back of my mind, I'm off for a radox bath, as my hamstring is a tad on the tight side today.......